Comments on: Self-Image: How to Get an Undentable One http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one Strength Training For Body And Mind Sat, 11 Feb 2012 06:13:10 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Criticism: from fragile flower to man-eater. One blogger's journey | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-10741 Criticism: from fragile flower to man-eater. One blogger's journey | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Fri, 26 Mar 2010 07:03:24 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-10741 [...] from that crouching realization sprang a guest post I wrote about criticism for Josh Hanagarne’s World’s Strongest [...] [...] from that crouching realization sprang a guest post I wrote about criticism for Josh Hanagarne’s World’s Strongest [...]

]]> By: Sensual Massage and The Art of RSS | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-8528 Sensual Massage and The Art of RSS | Cleavage by Kelly Diels. Fri, 05 Feb 2010 05:56:27 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-8528 [...] if you like my work or pity me or are in any way worried about my fragile flowerishness, then please sign up. Thank you. I’ll love you long [...] [...] if you like my work or pity me or are in any way worried about my fragile flowerishness, then please sign up. Thank you. I’ll love you long [...]

]]> By: Oleg Mokhov http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-4036 Oleg Mokhov Wed, 21 Oct 2009 16:30:55 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-4036 Hey Kelly, If you truly are happy with who you are, nothing else matters. No amount of criticism will dent your self-image because you know who you are to be true. You believe in what you do and how you do it, so you don't need others to validate you, and you can easily brush off comments telling you you're wrong. Criticism becomes an external object. It's like someone pointing at the grass and telling you its blue; it's just not true in your reality, and it doesn't phase you. If a criticism makes sense to you, you can consider it, but the point is they're all on the same external level. They don't get to you personally. Your self-image is undentable. Focus on what makes you happy. Live that confidently. You'll know for sure that what you're doing is at least right for one person: YOU. If it wasn't, you wouldn't enjoy it so much. That builds confidence, which leads to outside opinions becoming neutral external objects rather than potent personal jabs. Thanks for sharing your personal story, and how you have been able to strengthen your self-image online, Oleg Hey Kelly,

If you truly are happy with who you are, nothing else matters.

No amount of criticism will dent your self-image because you know who you are to be true. You believe in what you do and how you do it, so you don’t need others to validate you, and you can easily brush off comments telling you you’re wrong.

Criticism becomes an external object. It’s like someone pointing at the grass and telling you its blue; it’s just not true in your reality, and it doesn’t phase you. If a criticism makes sense to you, you can consider it, but the point is they’re all on the same external level. They don’t get to you personally. Your self-image is undentable.

Focus on what makes you happy. Live that confidently. You’ll know for sure that what you’re doing is at least right for one person: YOU. If it wasn’t, you wouldn’t enjoy it so much. That builds confidence, which leads to outside opinions becoming neutral external objects rather than potent personal jabs.

Thanks for sharing your personal story, and how you have been able to strengthen your self-image online,
Oleg

]]> By: Kelly Diels http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3840 Kelly Diels Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:50:31 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3840 @Andrew. You're so insightful. I usually embrace (I know, you're all shocked) and you are RIGHT, people melt. You expect prickles but they're really pears. @Ronna. I swear you're blowing my head up like a balloon on a daily basis. Please don't stop. @Andrew. You’re so insightful. I usually embrace (I know, you’re all shocked) and you are RIGHT, people melt. You expect prickles but they’re really pears.

@Ronna. I swear you’re blowing my head up like a balloon on a daily basis. Please don’t stop.

]]> By: Josh Hanagarne http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3839 Josh Hanagarne Thu, 15 Oct 2009 02:37:28 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3839 Andrew, I'm a push back person. And you're right. Some of them are still running. Andrew, I’m a push back person. And you’re right. Some of them are still running.

]]> By: Andrew http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3838 Andrew Thu, 15 Oct 2009 02:35:22 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3838 Hey Josh, I've always been here, hiding in the wings. You know something that I've learned over the years is that bullies are bullies because of one of two reasons. 1. They are jealous people who make an attempt to steal your thunder through their own bullying. 2. They are afraid of their own shadow and compensate for that by being aggressive and abrupt. How I've learned to deal with them is for the 1st type, embrace them. They'll crumble like a cookie. For the 2nd type, push back. They'll run for the hills. Hey Josh, I’ve always been here, hiding in the wings.

You know something that I’ve learned over the years is that bullies are bullies because of one of two reasons.

1. They are jealous people who make an attempt to steal your thunder through their own bullying.
2. They are afraid of their own shadow and compensate for that by being aggressive and abrupt.

How I’ve learned to deal with them is for the 1st type, embrace them. They’ll crumble like a cookie. For the 2nd type, push back. They’ll run for the hills.

]]> By: Josh Hanagarne http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3837 Josh Hanagarne Thu, 15 Oct 2009 02:28:41 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3837 Hey Andrew, glad you made it. I think the distinction between abuse and criticism couldn't be more clear. Abuse is perverse. It is made of whatever a stronger person gets out of attacking a weaker one. It preys on the vulnerable and steals confidence. It is about control and cruelty and depravity. Sorry--I've got some real issues with this. I've seen too much of it and I hate bullies. Glad you made it, though! Hey Andrew, glad you made it. I think the distinction between abuse and criticism couldn’t be more clear. Abuse is perverse. It is made of whatever a stronger person gets out of attacking a weaker one. It preys on the vulnerable and steals confidence. It is about control and cruelty and depravity.

Sorry–I’ve got some real issues with this. I’ve seen too much of it and I hate bullies. Glad you made it, though!

]]> By: Andrew http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3836 Andrew Thu, 15 Oct 2009 02:26:41 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3836 Kelly, I love this article. Your honesty and ability to express your frustration and learn from your experience is so refreshing. Personally I think there is very clear distinction between criticism and abuse. As Casey said it's better to get some feedback, even if it's not what you want, or expect to hear, rather than being ignored completely. There is not a lot you can learn from silence, but there is plenty you can learn from even the harshest critics. Abuse however is something to totally ignore! Kelly, I love this article. Your honesty and ability to express your frustration and learn from your experience is so refreshing.

Personally I think there is very clear distinction between criticism and abuse. As Casey said it’s better to get some feedback, even if it’s not what you want, or expect to hear, rather than being ignored completely.

There is not a lot you can learn from silence, but there is plenty you can learn from even the harshest critics.

Abuse however is something to totally ignore!

]]> By: Ronna Detrick http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/4018/self-image-how-to-get-an-undentable-one/comment-page-1/#comment-3835 Ronna Detrick Wed, 14 Oct 2009 23:44:49 +0000 http://worldsstrongestlibrarian.com/?p=4018#comment-3835 So, so beautiful, Kelly. I especially love the movement toward/awareness of personal development. Whether we like it or not, the opportunity for such is rife - in affirmation and love (or marriage proposals) as well as in criticism or rejection (and turndowns). Thanks, as always, for being raw, honest, and true! So, so beautiful, Kelly. I especially love the movement toward/awareness of personal development. Whether we like it or not, the opportunity for such is rife – in affirmation and love (or marriage proposals) as well as in criticism or rejection (and turndowns). Thanks, as always, for being raw, honest, and true!

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