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The Freshwater Cyclops of Wal-Mart

Megan Horton

Megan Horton

It’s an exciting day today.  My sister Megan Horton has been the inspiration behind the articles Why You Should Question Your First Reaction and parts of How To Have Tourette’s Part 4.  She is best known on the blog for diving out of a moving car when a grasshopper jumped on her and for the dynamite fists she unloads on anyone who makes fun of me.

She was here for a visit yesterday and I convinced her to record one of my favorite stories of hers.  It’s about Wal-Mart, being an amazing cashier, getting hit with a customer’s purse, and the sorriest goldfish in existence.

For those of you who have asked if Megan is single–she isn’t, but she believes that you’re right to be infatuated with her.

Push the player below to listen:

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  • TheWordWire July 16, 2009, 10:57 am

    I couldn’t agree with your sister more: everyone deserves a goldfish with two eyes! I love customer service horror stories, and any that involve mutant fish earn bonus points in my book. Thank you.

    • Josh Hanagarne July 16, 2009, 11:07 am

      @thewordwire What is it about customer service horror stories? I love them too…more than I can explain. Part of it is that I work with the public and have stories of my own, but that’s not really the main thing.

      Otherwise, my favorite stories are about men who think they are smooth trying to pick up women who don’t think they are smooth at all. Hint, everyone. Send me those stories.

  • Marie July 16, 2009, 12:31 pm

    That is awesome. I can’t imagine acting in such a manner with any customer service representative. My mother would kill me (even though I am an adult and live away from home.)

  • Amy Warner July 16, 2009, 4:39 pm

    Great stories Megan!! You laugh just like Teena!!!

  • Ilaria July 17, 2009, 6:25 pm

    Hi Josh and Megan, what a great duo! You should have a weekly show. Loved the stories, can’t wait to hear more.
    Love to you both,
    Ilaria

    • Josh Hanagarne July 17, 2009, 6:44 pm

      Thanks Ilaria! We were actually just talking about that because I finally learned how to use Skype. Megan lives in Denver but there’s really no reason we couldn’t do this once a week if we wanted.

  • Torbjørn July 18, 2009, 1:46 am

    Hey Josh, What a great post. I loved the horror story about the purse. It’s funny how customers will lie and complain just to get attention and possibly scam a few bucks from a company.

    Megan, You really should have told that CSM how much of an idiot he was. If the lady had brought the goldfish home and noticed it only had one eye, she would have probably exchanged it anyways. That, and what if someone came in and said “oh cool, a goldfish with one eye!” and buys it, fully knowing that it was a cyclops. Wal Mart can only benefit from good customer service.

    Great post Josh, I’ll be coming back often!

  • Gracie M July 20, 2009, 4:33 pm

    I love to hear these funny stories it makes my day a lot happier.
    Great job Megan!