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Tourette’s Update

Okay, a few wonderful souls keep asking how I’m doing, so here’s the update:

The Tourette’s is currently back, in a big way. The most challenging thing about this resurgence is that during my respite, all of my tic muscles and tendons withered up! The body strengthens itself and creates tissue based on whatever movements and positions it performs and assumes most frequently.

Well, I’d built up a delightful tolerance to a whole bunch of nonsense. Then the nonsense stopped–meaning, the specific movements of the tics stopped–and now those movements feel clumsy, awkward, and like I haven’t done them in a long time. It’s not entirely unlike muscle soreness, I’m just sore in weird places.

It’s annoying and tiring and I do not accept it. I thrashed it in its former incarnation. I’ll do it with this one as well. It’s probably just going to take some time while I figure out which questions to ask.

Currently, strength training makes it worse. Sitting makes it worse. Standing makes it worse. Ditto breathing, food, sleep, work, walking, crawling, running, etc.

I sound like a goose riding around on a blaring foghorn.

I am jerking and twitching around like the most dashing, debonair, muscular marionette you’ve ever seen.

My blue eyes, usually the toast of the globe, are bloodshot and stupid-looking.

I am writing the book in very small bursts because I have to psyche myself up just to sit down and type, because typing is when things are currently getting really erratic with my hand tics.

I’ve got too much crap to do to be sidelined. And it’s still getting done.

Don’t be inspired by that. I’m cranky and annoyed and I want to go home sick and I want to pull someone’s arm off (not yours!).

But I won’t. I am fulfilling my obligations and playing the productive gentleman out of pure spite.

I’m not great company right now.

But as always, thanks for the concern, the emails, and for letting me whine.

And now? Off to deadlift at lunch.The bar will bend and I’ll pretend it means something and take another step forward and be stronger tomorrow because of it.





Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Spencer February 6, 2012, 5:20 pm

    Hang in there, dawg. You were great company on the phone, just like old times.

    Also, you make me want to step up my deadlift.

    Also my writing.

    Also…everything else.

    None of this can step to you. Word up!

  • Casey February 6, 2012, 6:53 pm

    I am confident that you will soon be as agile and graceful as Madonna was during her halftime show. In the meantime we’re all rooting for you.

  • Jeanette February 7, 2012, 1:04 am

    Josh, so sorry for the setback!!! Just keep reminding yourself that’s what it is…a setback. You’ll kick this.

  • Todd February 7, 2012, 8:20 am

    Praying for you, big guy. Whoop them ticks into submission!

  • Pauline February 7, 2012, 10:17 am

    Hang on and keep working through it, Josh. You have no idea how many people are on your side and sending strengthening thoughts your way.

  • Jeroen February 8, 2012, 3:13 am

    Even if you feel like shit, you are still inspiring people to read, write and lift every day. And that definitely means something.

  • Sheri February 10, 2012, 1:15 pm

    Thanks for putting life in perspective for me, Josh. I’m sitting here having a pity party over a cold/bronchitis/flu??? that has lingered waaaaaaay to long, and then I read about your current challenges.

    Sending good thoughts, karma, and a prayer to you, dude. Take solace in the fact that you inspire many people with your courage, commitment and take-no-prisoners outlook. (Gag, my whining hasn’t inspired anyone, including me!)

    Big cyber hug.