≡ Menu

On The Other Side of Fear



Fear of failure - click for photo credit

Guest post by Tim from Renegade Dad

I’ve been in business to business sale ever since I graduated college and although it has been a lot of fun and a rewarding experience, I never felt like I it was what I was supposed to be doing. 

I can’t explain where that feeling comes from, it’s just there. And it’s been nagging me for a long time.

Over the years that saying “follow your passion and the money will come” kept replaying in my mind.

But for some reason, I had a hard time pinpointing what I am passionate about AND how to make a living from that passion.

I had done numerous exercises to discover my passions but I just couldn’t figure it all out.

And then I finally came to the realization that my problem wasn’t that I couldn’t identify my passions.

 My passions were actually very clear to me and one passion stood out over all the rest. My passion for health and fitness.  

So why the hell have I been working in business to business technology sales for the past decade?!

The answer is simple.

Fear or as Dr. Wayne Dyer describes it, False Evidence Appearing Real.

I had built up a bunch of False Evidence in my head that Appeared Real.

As soon as I would start to seriously consider a career in the health and fitness world, my mind would start swirling with all kinds of negative thoughts like….

What if I try this and decide a couple years later it’s not for me?

What if I’m not able to make the same amount of money?

Will my friends and family think I’m nuts?

 Will I get laughed at?

What if I ruin my passion by making it my career?

This could be a huge mistake!

These thoughts or false evidence made the possibility of a career change seem massive and terrifying.

And it stopped me dead in my tracks.

Until a couple years later when the nagging feeling about crept up on me again.

And then I realized that I would never be truly successful until I followed my passion and made a career out of it and the ONLY reason I wasn’t doing it, was because I was letting fear hold me back.

There were no valid reasons why I shouldn’t take the plunge, only false evidence appearing real.

So I decided it was time to kick fear in the ass and stop letting it hold me back from the life I was meant to live and then suddenly something amazing happened.

Once I made that decision, all of the fear and worry disappeared and I experienced a happiness and sense of fulfillment so strong that I knew I could not fail.

I imagined how amazing it would be to finally love what I do for a living and resolved to never let fear hold me back again.

Now I am overcome with such an amazing feeling that it can’t be described in words.

It gives me chills up my spine and brings tears to my eyes.

And it’s something I think everyone should experience.

I know that life is crazy and moves really fast.

But life is meant to be incredible, every minute of it, work and free time.

Actually, if you ask people who love what they do for a living, they don’t call it “work”.

It’s not work to them because they love it, it’s fun and it fulfills them.

It invigorates them and excites them.

But it also brings a huge sense of peace, because it’s not a struggle. It’s what they love and were meant to do and it is effortless.

We owe it to ourselves and we owe it to the world to stop letting fear hold us back.

And it doesn’t just have to be with our career, it could be anything.

Maybe we  are afraid to call an old friend because we are afraid of how they will respond?

Maybe we are afraid to tell someone we love how we really feel about them?

Maybe we are afraid to speak up for ourselves when we know we should?

It’s ok to be afraid. Just don’t let it hold you back.

What you find may surprise you.

Because on the other side of fear lies the really good stuff in life.

About the author

Visit Tim Murphy at his blog Renegade Dad, where he writes about extraordinary fitness for extraordinary dads.

Comments on this entry are closed.

  • Todd August 6, 2011, 5:37 am

    Well said, Tim. Love Renegade Dad.

    • Tim August 11, 2011, 1:32 pm

      Thanks Todd!

  • Laila Atallah August 8, 2011, 5:06 pm

    Tim: Nice post! As a career counselor, I hear these fears frequently (or read them between the lines). It’s helpful and inspiring to hear how your personal struggle and story evolved. And, to now hear that you took the leap, it was worth it! Congrats on your success and thanks for sharing. Real life examples are often the thing that push us over the edge into believing we can actually make our cherished dreams happen.

    • Tim August 11, 2011, 1:40 pm

      Thanks Laila! I think this quote says it all…“All life is a chance. The person who goes farthest is the one who is willing to do and dare.”— Dale Carnegie