People watching can be fun. I think I enjoy hearing snippets of conversations even more most of the time, particularly if I have no idea who is talking. Some things are memorable enough that I write them down for fear that they might be forgotten. Some are so unforgettable that the paper is not necessary.
The statements below come from the last five years I have spent in libraries, and comprise both categories.
Sometimes sad, sometimes funny, sometimes appalling, and almost always stuff that would be impossible to make up.
- If you call it stadium seating one more time I’ll kill you.
- What do you mean “Why did I go on the floor?” The bathroom was closed for cleaning!
- And then he drank the water right out of the vase!
- That was my boy. I guess they won’t let me adopt him back. I miss him.
- Solitaire is better than Warcraft.
- I’ll be quiet if you give me some Cheetos.
- I’m not sure if I’m going to have time for 8 seasons of Walker, Texas Ranger. Just give me 7.
- AT&T has made my life a live Hell. I never forgive them.
- For the record, America’s homeless are superior to any other countries’.
- The immigrants don’t want my job. Nobody does. Including me.
- It’s been a good day so far. The homeless must be somewhere else on a field trip or something.
- Because I’m her friend and I want to know when she works, even if she says she doesn’t know me!
- Shoes are for commies.
- Nobody tells me where I can’t and can roll my dice.
- I’m a veteran and I get to eat these chips by the computer.
- Oh my God, if I see one more vegetarian in here I’m–Yes, I can tell them by the way they dress.
- Books are crap.
- Books are gay.
- Who would pay $1000 for a do rag?
- Man, China is so f***** up.
I love this place.